» Economic Stimulus $900

Stimulus Suggestion: Novelty mops!!

Kruddler! — Wed, 20 May 2009 06:04:27 +0000

Well we all remember those awesome Baby Mops that flooded the internetz not that long ago….now I have something that is probably slightly more legitimate! Walk ‘n’ Clean Mop Slippers easily mop your floors as you walk!! Yeah!!! 2 birds one stone much?? I think this is THE defintion. Combining a necessary life function whilst doing a menial chore! It would be like if they could combine urinating with folding the washing. Sure that’s not the best example, but you get the drift…right? Only $24.95 Australian +P/H!!

Stimulation has occured!! I am stimulated!!

Kruddler! — Wed, 06 May 2009 00:04:16 +0000

It’s finally happened! Last night in my sleep Kevin Rudd graced me with his presence/presents and stimulated me!! Hooray!

So everyone that hasn’t received their money yet…don’t worry…I’m sure it’s on its way! It was the first time I’ve been stimulated by someone named Kevin and for the most part it was pretty painless (the wait nearly killed me though!).

If you are unsure about your payment…give the ATO a call on -1300 686 636!! Tell them Kruddler sent you!! No, probably don’t do that!

kevin rudd stimulation

Confirmation some students will get $1850

Kruddler! — Mon, 04 May 2009 12:17:56 +0000

So I’ve have confirmation from a student friend of mine that just received $900 after previously receiving the $950 for students! So there you go, you heard it here first!

Stimulus Suggestion: A whole chicken in a can!

Kruddler! — Fri, 01 May 2009 06:15:58 +0000

This was brought to my attention a matter of minutes ago, and I deemed it so important that I am posting its amazingness RIGHT NOW!! This wonderful Friday afternoon I propose that you spend your $900 stimulus money on CHICKEN IN A CAN!!!!! This is not a joke people! This ain’t Seaworld…this is real as it gets!!! Check out the site and according to the person who sent it to me the pictures, “are gross…and cannot be unseen!”. I believe every word of that. What scares me more…is that it is all legit, you can buy a 6-pack of Chicken in a Can from Amazon for $49.99 (US). WOW.

Stimulus Suggestion: Let’s buy the K Rudd’s house!!

Kruddler! — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 02:37:06 +0000

I had an exciting email the other day from a gentleman who had the incredible idea to purchase “The Lodge” (the PM’s house, not this movie) and “Kirribilli House”. He went on to say,

“So much of my money would be used to maintain these nice homes every year. I will never get to live in or even use a sheet to eat on the carpet in any of these Houses under the current arrangement and that disturbs me.”

He proposes an interesing idea, we should all pitch in and buy these houses, that way whenever we are in Sydney/Canberra we have somewhere to stay! Also, it will feel as though we really do own a part of this country!!Power to the people! Also, we can charge Rudd for rent!! It’s this simple- if we put in 20 cents each we could spend $1.6 million dollars on buying his house/s!

Important postcode news!

Kruddler! — Thu, 16 Apr 2009 07:32:35 +0000

I have decided to post all of the postcodes that I have received over the past week on this page and on the Receivers page. I am also claiming that I have managed to work out the algorithm for the sending out of stimulus packages! LOLZER. Well it’s day 9 and I still haven’t got my money! My lame co-worker and my boss got their money today!! So not keen! I need some hope!!

A coffin.

Kruddler! — Sun, 05 Apr 2009 21:14:00 +0000

There is a lot of frivolity that goes on around this website, and I guess there has been an outcry for some serious suggestions. Well I received a delightful tip-off from one of BM900′s wonderful Twitter followers! She suggested to think ahead and buy yourself your very own coffin! I mean when you think about it, you probably won’t get to choose it, and well you will end up spending a lot of time in it! Think of your loved ones and the torment they will have to go through picking out a coffin for their son/daughter/secret lover/mother/un-loved middle child/step-father Steve, and buy your own coffin today!!! Actually, I think I would buy this one off Ebay cause it kinda looks used(which is awesome!), and well I would have enough money left over for a chainsaw, flamethrower and jackhammer, cause seriously who’s NOT afraid of being buried alive?!

Brian Pape rejected!!! Stimulus package is a go!!!!!!

Kruddler! — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 23:51:46 +0000

Well you heard it here first, or unless you have seen THIS ARTICLE…but the $900 stimulus package fight by Brian Pape has been rejected by the High Court!!!! Booyah! I think this may have put the payments back a bit. Originally they were meant to be sent out today, but I’m guessing it will be next week now!!!

Stun gun/pepper spray dispenser.

Kruddler! — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 17:35:50 +0000

As you may have seen, I attempted to April Fool people yesterday with varying degrees of effectiveness. Actually I did receive a phonecall from somebody at their wits end pleading for it not to be true, and an explanation to their husband as to where they are going to get the $900 to pay for 6 pairs of bikini jeans they had ordered! Anyways, I also arrived at work to find that someone had programmed my computer to play 3 Richard Marx songs on repeat, and they hid it as a duplicate system process so I couldnt find it, awesome. Anyways, next year I will be ready… I know this is a bit of a rehash on the mobilephone and knuckle duster tasers post from oh so long ago, but I thought it was fitting. This thing is amazing! You can either tase then pepper spray them, or pepper spray them and then tase them! So many options. I totally think that these things would be illegal in Australia, but I just thought I would share it.

A novelty Haircut!

Kruddler! — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 17:16:19 +0000

One of my regular contributors finally sent me something worthwhile, so I thought I would share it. Ted sugegsts that we use the money to purchase novelty haircuts! It surely would put me in a great mood if my annoying co-worker came in tomorrow with his hair shaped like a 19th century whaling boat or a banana. The BM900 staff enquired about getting their hair shaped into a 19th century whaling boat and were politely told by the hairdresser down at the local shop (‘The Hairem’) …”it would cost about $320″. So there you go! Here are some examples for you stimulus package spendage….